Stress and anxiety
When my son fell out with his friends at school
recently he got very upset and anxious. At first, I
wondered what all the fuss was about but then I
realised how important friends can be at his age.
Children can feel stressed for many reasons.
Being bullied at school and par
ents
divorcing are two of the most common.
Sometimes parents don’t realise they are
putting too much pressure on their child to
do well at school.
Exercise is a great way to reduce stress.
Children can pick up on parents stress.
Sometimes children get stressed and
anxious and there may be many
reasons why this can happen:
• they are being bullied at school.
Feeling in danger every day can
greatly affect a child’s state of mind
• they are not getting on well with
their friends. It’
s natural to want to fit
in and falling out with friends can
seem like a really important thing to
a child
• they are anxious about moving,
starting a new school or going back
to school after the holidays
• a family member, friend or pet has
died. Sometimes children can blame
themselves for these things even if
they have nothing to do with it.
Another reason that children feel
anxious is if their parents split up or
fight. When they see their parents
arguing it can affect a child’s sense of
security and can make them feel very
alone and frightened. It is worse when
parents make their children choose
sides or say hurtful comments about
the other parent in front of the child.
Some children worry about schoolwork,
tests or exams. It’s normal to want to
see your child do well, but some
parents may not realise that they are
putting too much pressure on their
child to do well. Remember to be
realistic about your child’s abilities and
encourage them to do their best.
Think about what you say - a passing
comment you didn’t really mean can
be blown out of all proportion.
Sometimes, children overhear parents
talking about money worries or
problems they are having at work and
they start to feel anxious about these
things themselves. It can be easy to
pass on your own anxiety.
You will probably be able to help your
child when they feel stressed. If their
anxiety goes on for longer than a
month, or if it greatly affects how they
are at home or their behaviour at
school, you might want to speak to
their teacher or ask your health visitor,
school nurse or doctor for help.
Helping them cope
”
“
Mood swings, trouble sleeping,
nightmares, bedwetting, trouble
doing schoolwork, stomach
aches, headaches, preferring to
spend time alone, overreacting
to minor problems.
Make sure your child gets
enough sleep and a healthy diet.
Exercise can reduce stress, so
encourage your child to exercise.
Talk to your child about what is
causing their stress. Tell them it is
normal to feel stressed now and
again, but it is also good to
know how to relax and make
yourself feel better when they’re
upset.
Make time for your child every
day so they know they can talk
to you if they are worried. Look
ahead to when your child may
be stressed e.g. before tests, and
talk about it.
• Brent Children and Families
Information Service (CFIS) on
020 8937 3001
www.brent.gov.uk/parenting
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